In the summer of 1998, firthofforth and I were vacationing in Colorado. As we're prone to do, we took some of our spare time to go and see a movie. Since we were in the mood for something fun and light--a junk food movie, if you will--we ventured to a nearby theater and saw Armageddon, Michael Bay's third feature and his follow-up to the flawed-but-mindlessly-entertaining The Rock.

My old colleague in movie criticism soul_shear once talked about the sensation of so loathing a movie while you watch it that if the director happened to be sitting next to you in the theater you would feel compelled to spin around and punch him (or her, but disproportionately him) square in the face. That's exactly how I felt watching Armageddon. I despised it and despised Michael Bay for making it. As finally, blessedly left the theater, I swore I would never again watch a Michael Bay movie. Ten years later, that pledge is retracted today in the most brutal fashion I can imagine.

Since Armageddon, Michael Bay has directed four features: Pearl Harbor, Bad Boys II, The Island and Transformers. Today, I'm going to watch them all. In succession. And I'm bringing you all with me, liveblogging all the way.

I'm still not certain of the best way to do this using the livejournal interface, but I'm planning to post regularly as I go, definitely after each film with a few observations scattered throughout. Keep watching this space. Unless the general critical consensus about Bay's artistry is off-base, today is going to get ugly.

( Pearl Harbor (Michael Bay, 2001). )

( Bad Boys II (Michael Bay, 2003). )

( The Island (Michael Bay, 2005). )

( Transformers (Michael Bay, 2007). )

THERE...I did it. I feel a little like someone installed a radio tuned between stations inside my skull, but I did it.

Now I think I should go read a book for awhile.