The Long of It, The Short of It
Circa 2000

The scheme behind this one should be apparent. I'd been stewing on this idea for some time before perching in front on the stereo to pull it together. This would be so much easier in the iTunes era, just for the relative ease in scanning the thousands of titles at my disposal.

SIDE ONE
THE GODFATHERS, "Just Because You're Not Paranoid Doesn't Mean To Say They're Not Going To Get You!"
In the most recent Five for Friday, the man who wears number 19 for the Cakers reminded me of this British band that had a minor hit in the late 1980's with a succinct cataloging of the rigors of life. Despite the relatively small splash they made, there was still a "best of" release, which is where I pulled this from.
BEULAH, "If We Can Land a Man on the Moon, Surely I Can Win Your Heart"
YO LA TENGO, "Ultra-Powerful Short Wave Radio Picks Up Music From Venus"
FLAMING LIPS, "Guy Who Got a Headache and Accidentally Saves The World"
The lyrics are fairly vague, but this song somehow always felt fully fleshed out to me. Like the saga of Yoshimi that eventually followed, it seems like a completely, weird short story.
LYLE LOVETT, "Ballad of the Snow Leopard and the Tanqueray Cowboy"
THE JUDYBATS, "Down in the Shacks Where the Satellite Dishes Grow"
AMERICAN MUSIC CLUB, "How Many Six Packs Does It Take To Screw In A Light?"
MANIC STREET PREACHERS, "If You Tolerate This, Your Children Will Be Next"
On the rare occasions that I invoke Manic Street Preachers in this slice of the Web, I inevitably feel like I'm pleading for forgiveness from ilikemusic for not liking them more.
THE MAGNETIC FIELDS, "The Sun Goes Down and the World Goes Dancing"
U2, "Tryin' To Throw Your Arms Around the World"
BUFFALO TOM, "Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, Get Your Adverbs Here"
I dislike grammar enough that despite an Bachelor of Arts in English and this song representing one of my favorite Schoolhouse Rock's, I'm still can't tell you what an adverb is with any authority. I love those old Saturday morning lessons-in-catchy-disguise and the idea of the covers record seemed somewhat inspired at the time. It wasn't a great CD to listen to all the way through, but it was nice to have around for mixes.
DUSTY SPRINGFIELD, "I Just Don't Know What To Do With Myself"
MASSIVE ATTACK WITH TRACEY THORN, "The Hunter Gets Captured by the Game"

SIDE TWO
DJ RAP, "Go"
DANCE HALL CRASHERS, "Go"
Ha ha, see what I did there?
NED'S ATOMIC DUSTBIN, "You"
R.E.M., "You"
Ha ha, see what I did there?
GREEN DAY, "She"
THE BREEDERS, "Hag"
VIOLENT FEMMES, "Fat"
CONCRETE BLONDE, "Sun"
GAY DAD, "Joy"
I recall pouring through the high stack of CMJ New Music Monthly compilation CD's, figuring that if I was going to make my song selections largely on the basis on the relative length of the song titles, I may as well find some stuff I wouldn't otherwise think to listen to. The name of this band is awful enough that I may have regularly bypassed them, but this song is damn catchy.
BEN FOLDS FIVE, "Army"
I probably should have tried to stick with two-letter and three-letter songs titles, but, as I recall, I really wanted to get this Ben Folds Five song on a tape. I was still several months away from a move to the south, so I didn't know that the reference to Chick-Fil-A was about an actual restaurant chain.
LIZ PHAIR, "Ride"
ANI DIFRANCO, "Itch"
BIG STAR, "Feel"
ELASTICA, "Blue"
THE REPLACEMENTS, "Otto"
Those were the days.